TIPLO in excelsis!

Last night TIPLO - The Intellectual Property Lawyers' Organisation - held its Christmas Dinner Meeting at the Old Hall, Lincoln's Inn, London. The IPKat couldn't be there, but his mole was able to record for posterity the lyrics of this year's highly original carols, fresh from the pen of multi-talented Richard Vary (Nokia).
While Trade Mark Agents Slept
(to the tune of While Shepherds Watched)

While Trade Mark Agents slept at night
And dreamed their filing dreams,
An email from the IP Kat
appeared upon their screens.
“Fear not!” it said, for fear of change
had seized their troubled minds:
”Glad tidings of great joy I bring
To you and all your kind.”
“To you in Newport town this day
The IPO doth warn –
It won't object on relative grounds
To your TM 3 form.”
Thus spake the email and forthwith
Began the race to pen
Their legal updates to their clients
To pass the news to them
All glory be to Geoffrey Hobbs!
Who now shall get no peace
As opposition hearings shall
Begin and never cease.


In the Courts of Justice
(to the tune of In the Bleak Midwinter)

In the Courts of Justice
frosty draughts attend
counsel for the Claimant
and his learned friend.
Frost formed on the pleadings
ice on Kitchin J
in the Courts of Justice
yesterday
Experts, whilst opining
whether to revoke,
feel the winter's chill be-
neath the skilled man's cloak.
Fingers turning numb, their
flags they cannot plant.
Better central heating
is their long-felt want.
How long can we argue
in this room so cold?
How long shall we sit here
slowly growing old
in this aged court, 'neath
the judge's icy stare?
At least the closing speeches
should supply hot air.


We Three Patent Barristers
(to the tune of We Three Kings)

We three patent barristers are
reading updates from afar
Seagate, DESA
Eolas, Quanta
Ebay and K.S.R.
O, stare in wonder, congress might
vote for "first to file" tonight.
Means plus function,
no injunction,
federal circuit sees the light
In between the Rhine and the Ruhr
Where infringement follows Funkuhr
They'll encompass
Standard-Spundfass,
Batteriekastenschnur

O, try to sing this, if you please
German lawyers earn their fees!
Long-name cases
with no spaces
How can they remember these?
In the east there shineth a star
Over China's IPR
TRIPs accession
Hu's succession
Rapidly growing bar
O - lympic counterfeiters fear
Tough enforcement from new year
Competition
Law admission
Fills us all with Christmas cheer!
If you want to reserve tickets for the TIPLO Christmas Dinner 2008, email here; to volunteer for the TIPLO Singers next year, email here