Haiku competition: best ineligible efforts

Apart from the serious entries to the Copying Without Infringing competition (here), the IPKat received some hilarious and not always entirely publishable material from a number of creative readers who felt (i) unduly restricted by the haiku format, (ii) unduly restricted by the subject matter on offer or (iii) generally inspired to write greater things. Among these offerings were the following:

From Sandra Beelaard (Advocaat, De Brauw Blackstone Westbroek N.V.: "Well, not really a Haiku, but it was fun nonetheless")
To infringe, or not to infringe: that is the question:
Whether keywords are the domain controlled
Exclusively by rightholders' whims,
Or the prerogatives of advertisers' lust,
And by an answer end it? To question, to litigate;
No more; and by the answer to say we end
The darkness of uncertainty arising
From the depths of Luxembourg, 'tis an answer
Devoutly to be wish'd. To question, to litigate;
To litigate: perchance to reason: ay, there's the rub;
For in that trial what reason may befall
Raising yet another question, only to
Await another ruling: there's the aspect
That makes European trademark law so complex.
In Haiko style that would be:

To infringe
Or not to infringe
That's the question
From Dr Stephen Wintersgill (IP Manager, University of Central Lancashire) comes a haiku which, while not falling within one of the competition categories, would probably win the support of a number of judges in the Court of Justice of the European Communities, and reflect the sentiment of many other good folk, when he writes
Football league fixtures
protected database rights
enforceable? My arse.
Straight from the heart, that one.


Finally, Shabtai Atlow (patent attorney, NDS) writes "OK, it isn’t your contest. And it isn’t a haiku, but ...". Then, after reminding us of the famous verse concerning Tweedledum and Tweedledee, he quotes:
Bud-o-var and Bud-e-J
Agreed to have a battle;
For Bud-o-var said Bud-e-J
Had spoiled his nice new rattle.

Just then flew down a monstrous Robin,
As black as judge’s robes;
Which frightened both the heroes so,
They quite forgot their quarrel.
Thanks, all of you, for your efforts!